Time to poke my head in.

On my way into the livingroom to watch Lone Wolf and Cub some more and recuperate from this month's internal torment session.

There's been a bunch of strangeness floating around in my head these past few days, but I haven't had the time or the presence of mind to sit and put pen to paper, so to speak. Lots of moments. Little pieces of time that stick like burrs to your mental socks.

Images from half-remembered dreams, woken from unceremoniously by a lover's arm hitting me in the side of the head as they turn over in the morning, bits of memories from beloveds long missed, threads that have been woven throughout my life, in ways I never really noticed at the time.. but that grow more relevant as I find new ways to hide from myself as I get older. I'm so glad I've kept journals running for so long. I can see the patterns so much more clearly, even from as close as 5 years ago.. and I look forward to looking back years from now and watch the changing colors of this tapestry shimmer in the light of self-awareness.

If I ever loved you, you are still a part of me, and always will be, in one form or another. The people I choose to share myself and my time with change me. I am different for having known everyone who enters my life, and the ways we change and part, and the reasons for all our coming and going. Even the most painful of these experiences has made me stronger, and I have been blessed by the time I've shared with those I love.

On that introspective note, I'm going to go watch samurai slice each other to ribbons.

Later.

-Me.

----------------------------------------


"Get me Neil on the line
No I can't hold
have him read

"Snow
Glass
Apples"
where
nothing is
what
it
seems "

-Tori Amos, from Carbon